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They say I, Lizzie, took an axe
And gave my mother forty whacks,
Then when I saw what I had done,
I gave my father forty-one.

But in their research they’ve been lax,
So I am here to give the facts,
Because my folks were felled by blows
In numbers less extreme than those.
.

.
.
And I’m not guilty by a mile,
Acquitted as I was at trial,
‘Cause none could prove I was to blame,
Despite the way I rose to fame.

But if you’d lived with Mum and Dad
You might decide I’m not that bad,
So I won’t be a hypocrite—
I think that they both axed for it!
.

🎃 Happy Halloween, Swooners! 🪓

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